The Family Birthday
Why Our Kids Celebrate Our Anniversary
2nd Annual Wood Family Birthday Party
Eleven years ago, our family began, not just with a wedding, but with a covenant. Corinne and I stood before God and our community and said yes. That yes wasn't just for us. It was for them too, the children who would one day call our house home.
Last year we started a new tradition: turning our anniversary into a family birthday party. We do it because we want to give our kids a window into our history. We want them to hear the memories that ultimately formed them, to learn their own origin story, to feel the foundation of a shared family culture.
Marriage is the daily ground our children stand on. The vows we made eleven years ago are the safety they live inside every day.
The calendar is a beautiful teaching tool for family culture. Anniversary day and Passover day are some of our biggest.
They give us a chance to remind our kids of the difficult and joyful seasons of our life and how we made decisions when we faced hard choices. They get to hear how we chose to love each other. They get to learn what a marriage ceremony actually is, who was there, why we invited them, what we said to each other, why those words mattered, and how the covenant we made with God that day has given them a safe place to live and love ever since.
Never underestimate the calendar. Always try to take advantage.
Practically speaking, none of this has to be elaborate. We get a cookie cake and sparkling lemonade. (Corinne thought for a second she’d accidentally bought the alcoholic kind, after one of our kids took a sip and made the most outrageous face I’ve ever seen. False alarm.) We might give the kids a few tiny presents or let them stay up and watch a movie. We do a fun dinner. We share old stories and flip through old iPhone photos from when we were dating, which inevitably ends with our daughter yelling, “Dad, why don’t you bring back the hair?”
That’s the tradition. Cookie cake, sparkling lemonade, photos, stories, and a few hours of telling our kids the truth about where their world started.
Marriage is a daily choice. Some days it’s hard. Every time we keep our promises, especially the hard ones, we give our kids something irreplaceable. Their confidence, their joy, their sense of belonging all grow out of it.
Yes, Corinne and I still make time for just the two of us to celebrate alone but this reminds everyone that marriage is also theirs. This tradition is how we show our kids that the covenant their parents made eleven years ago belongs to all of us now.
-Josh
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Currently, I serve as the Executive Director of Them Before Us, advocating globally for the rights and well-being of children.
I am also the co-founder of All The Good, a leadership organization helping non-profits do all the good they are called to do.
I studied Cross-Cultural Ministry and Humanitarian and Disaster Leadership at Messiah and Wheaton. I read a lot and sleep less than I probably should.
My wife and I live in Charlotte, North Carolina with our 4 kids.
I love this idea!
Love this idea.