The Church Formula Hoax
A Masterclass in Missing the Point
A TikTok video has gone viral showing a woman calling churches across the South, asking if they could immediately provide formula for a starving baby. The results—38 churches, with only 9 saying yes—have sparked outrage about church hypocrisy. The few that said yes notably included a Buddhist temple and an Islamic center.
But as someone who ran missions and outreach at a large church, this “experiment” is incredibly misleading. Let me explain why.
The Reality of Church Benevolence
I managed a ministry that gave away millions of dollars annually. Our members volunteered tens of thousands of hours locally and globally. We received so many emergency calls like the one in this video that we had an entire staff position dedicated to handling them.
Here’s what we learned: We were getting thousands of inquiries yearly (in person and by phone) all presenting emergency circumstances often with “life and death” decisions. Once we started tracking requests in Salesforce, we discovered something concerning: While not widespread, there were enough cases of the same individuals getting aid from multiple campuses monthly—the same bills, the same hungry children, the same rent needing to be paid—that we had to become more careful and discerning.
Helping by paying was actually hurting, perpetuating dependence without addressing root problems like addiction, lack of education, or job skills.
The Better Way to Help
There are certainly times when immediate help is warranted in especially dire situations. But 99% of the time, the better move is connecting people to trained community partners with the staffing and experience to stay connected and follow up with those experiencing need.
Your $50-100 goes much further supporting an organization employing social workers, rehabilitation specialists, or counselors who have the bandwidth, training, and connections to do more than supply an emergent need. Your precious resources and time should be spent on:
Assisting with transportation
Connecting three-way calls to shelters or pregnancy resource centers
Leveraging relationships to secure beds, appointments, and ongoing support
The Stewardship Principle
Churches need to be equipped to serve their community. They need partners they can refer community members to and should support those organizations with their dollars and platform. But not every small church is equipped to do this. Many are understaffed, overworked, bi-vocational, and experienced enough to know this won’t be the only call they get today.
Should they have resource lists? Yes.
Should they be willing to go the second mile? Whenever possible.
Churches that had no good answers or resources to point toward should reflect and fix that issue.
However.
Churches practicing careful stewardship aren’t being stingy—they’re being faithful.
Demanding immediate gifts with no questions asked doesn’t test generosity; it tests whether the church will abandon discernment under pressure. That’s wrong.
A Necessary Disclaimer
Let me be clear: I am the last person to defend the megachurch industrial complex.
In fact, I believe Christians should demand a higher level of transparency from our churches. We should challenge extravagant spending and the consumer culture that has become pervasive in too many congregations today. When churches spend thousands on light shows while their communities struggle, that’s a problem. When pastoral salaries rival corporate CEOs while ministry staff can barely make ends meet, that’s a problem. When building campaigns take priority over benevolence budgets, that’s a problem.
There are absolutely times to challenge and specific practices to confront. Challenge churches that don’t fund local ministries but spend extravagantly on amenities. Challenge the lack of financial accountability.
But here’s what we must remember: Overall, the church is still the backbone of ALL philanthropy in America. It is the primary moral teacher in society. It is the number one promoter of family formation ethics that represent the greatest reducer of poverty in the world.
So yes, challenge specific extravagant practices.
Demand transparency. Question priorities.
But don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater—or in this case, the formula.
The issue isn’t whether churches help. It’s how they help most effectively. And sometimes, that means saying no to enable a better yes.
Good Intentions Versus Good Outcomes
The churches that did offer to help right away no questions asked absolutely have their hearts in the right place. But that doesn’t necessarily make it the best choice. As Andy Stanley says, “Direction, not intention, determines destination.” If we’re not intervening in ways that help people help themselves—if we’re not addressing the systems and circumstances that created the crisis—we’re not truly doing justice.
We’re giving out band-aids for broken bones.
A Better Set of Questions
Instead of “exposing” churches with gotcha calls, perhaps we should be asking:
Which churches fund local nonprofits addressing poverty?
Which congregations have members volunteering at food banks every week?
How many addiction recovery programs meet in church basements?
How many after-school tutoring programs run in church classrooms?
How many churches provide free counseling services?
The answer might surprise those quick to judge the generosity of an ancient institution based on a 30-second phone call.
The Uncomfortable Truth
Finally, let me just say, if churches actually closed up shop, if they actually stopped volunteering, if they actually stopped giving and their people stopped hosting, our communities would be an absolute hellscape.
Our country takes for granted the peace, security, and generosity that our churches have encouraged, facilitated, and made possible. From hospitals to universities, from soup kitchens to disaster relief, from adoption services to refugee resettlement—the footprint of church-based compassion is so woven into our social fabric that we barely notice it until someone posts a misleading TikTok.
Churches aren’t perfect. Many need to do better at having clear processes for helping those in need who call the church. But reducing their ministry to a binary yes/no on an anonymous phone call misses the forest for the trees.
Real ministry happens in relationship, not transactions. And sometimes the most loving answer to “Can you give me money right now?” is “Let me connect you with someone who can help you never need to make this call again.”
The church isn’t failing America. In many ways, it’s the only thing keeping our social safety net from completely unraveling. Maybe it’s time we recognized that.
About Me:
I serve as the Executive Director of Them Before Us, advocating globally for the rights and well-being of children.
I am also the co-founder of All The Good, an organization helping non-profits around the world do all the good they can.
I studied Cross-Cultural Ministry and Humanitarian and Disaster Leadership at Messiah and Wheaton. I read a lot and sleep less than I probably should.
My wife and I live in Charlotte, North Carolina with our 4 kids.
